NewStats: 3,263,783 , 8,181,391 topics. Date: Saturday, 07 June 2025 at 09:48 PM e5d64

My Dearest Nairalanders,. here we go today!

I strongly believe All children in a family should be treated equally, to prevent psychological problems. But sometimes, parents do have a special favourite.

Although, it is possible for parents to have a stronger emotional bond with one child over another, though this can vary based on numerous factors. The funniest part is that
Most parents are not aware that they may have a favorite child and generally feel that they love all their children the same.

Is there anyway to love all the kids in a family equality?

obembet:
➜My Dearest Nairalanders,. here we go today! I strongly believe All children in a family should be treated equally, to prevent psychological problems. But sometimes, parents do have a special favourite.
Although, it is possible for parents to have a stronger emotional bond with one child over another, though this can vary based on numerous factors. The funniest part is that
➜Most parents are not aware that they may have a favorite child and generally feel that they love all their children the same. Is there anyway to love all the kids in a family equality?

1. I have never actually met parents who did that... loved their biological kids equally.

2. I don't know if it is possible, and it would be great if it were. I have met foster parents — non-biological parents, by the way— capable of loving their non-biological children equally. But I have yet to meet biological parents who do.

Kobojunkie:
1. I have never actually met parents who did that... loved their kids equally.

2. I don't know if it is possible, and it would be great if it were. But I have yet to meet parents who do.

But can u do it? Do u think it's possible not to have favourite among your kids?

obembet:
➜But can u do it? Do u think it's possible not to have favourite among your kids?

It is possible, however, that behavior — the urge to favor a particular biological child more than the others—seems to be mostly unconscious, leading me to believe that only self-aware biological parent units would have the ability to accomplish that. Most biological parents aren't.

In order to love your children equally, you have to first acknowledge the fact that you've been subjecting them to favouritism, something parents will never do, especially African parents... They'd rather try to manipulate the least favourite child or children into submission than acknowledging their desires to be treated equally with their other siblings.

Nothing you do will ever be enough for such parents... So the best thing to do is to just accept your fate, focus on empowering yourself and move on... Go where you're appreciated.

Samantha125:
In order to love your children equally, you have to first acknowledge the fact that you've been subjecting them to favouritism, something parents will never do, especially African parents... They'd rather try to manipulate the least favourite child or children into submission than acknowledging their desires to be treated equally with their other siblings.

Nothing you do will ever be enough for such parents... So the best thing to do is to just accept your fate, focus on empowering yourself and move on... Go where you're appreciated.

So politics start from home

It's not possible.... The best any parent can do is to hide their favouritism.... Even that's also hard but achievable

Of course they do... Over the years, I think I've fallen under the category of my mom's least favourite child because unlike the rest of my siblings who are more laid back and reserved, I've always been the outspoken and feisty one, I call a spade a spade regardless of who you are, I don't beat around the bush... And since I'm now an independent adult, her manipulations no longer work on me as I've grown accustomed to them... ... In fact, I'm now the one manipulating her because I've learnt from the best...

That alone has pushed me to be more closer to my father and the man has been my biggest fan since day one... I'm who I am today because of him.

obembet:


So politics start from home

Nlfpmod

Wawelexy:
It's not possible.... The best any parent can do is to hide their favouritism.... Even that's also hard but achievable

Must parents have favourite?

Nlfpmod

My mum loves all of us but deep down in me I know I have a very special place in her heart.

My siblings have accepted the fact that I am the first son and it's natural to share close bond with mummy. Though I ain't the eldest in the family because I have an elder sister but according to our tradition I am automatically the eldest child in the family.

My mum doesn't do anything without consulting me first. Even my girlfriend, now my wife noticed the love when they got to know each other.


Just few days ago I was iring my daughter (first and only child presently) and I jokingly asked my wife if she thinks I would be fond of our future children like her......She laughed and said why won't I be fond of them.

She's my first fruit and I love her so much, it's not as if I won't love my future children.....I was just thinking the fire might come down a bit on others.

obembet:


Must parents have favourite?

Nlfpmod

Yes, cos they are human, and that's how humans are being wired....

Unless they all behave exactly the same, the simple answer is No.

Some will be more stubborn, more intelligent, more destructive, more corrupt etc than others.

At the end of the day, we're still humans and human love is selfish and reciprocal.

Aura for aura
Ose for Ose.

I love all my kids 100% equally

Parents who claim they love their children equally are lying to themselves. When your child takes steps to please you and build the future you envision for him/her, there's no way you won't love them more than others. You can only try not show it so it doesn't cause bad blood among them.

Even God created us equally, but calls David the one after His heart because David understood that God loves praises and often goes buck naked to dance in praises to Him. His lifestyle endeared him to God.

Not possible. We are all humans with emotions, more especially when you believe in reincarnation. If your dad or mom was good to you before they died, your emotions will be tilted toward your children whom they reincarnated.

It'll be very rare to see this happen. If it does, it'll take a lot of mental discipline for that to happen.

In an ideal world, every parent would say "I love my kids equally". However, we don't live in an ideal world.

There are lots of factors that unconsciously creates biases in our head. The different characters our children exhibit, seldomly trigger these biases. Our unique reaction patterns overtime lays the building blocks towards an unconscious character build-up and labels towards these kids (this is stored in our heads).

While some of these characters maybe pleasing to us, others may appear deviant and honestly as humans, we are wired to favour or move towards things that appeal to our nature. For instance, a quarrelsome mother would most likely see a calm and peaceful child as "a deviant", while a hyperactive dad will see a laid-back child as "lazy" and vice versa. Little wonder why some parents would give some labels to their children however, outsiders would think differently of these labels (in both positive and negative scenarios)

While the mind may say "i love my kids equally" the body naturally and unconsciously gyrates towards that which pleases it.

Impossible due to Emotional Reciprocity.
Parents are human, and human love often responds to behavior. A respectful, affectionate, and cooperative child may naturally elicit warmer, more expressive affection than one who is distant or consistently rebellious.

Of course it is not possible to love all children equally. And every parent knows this, however there is a certain baseline of love that should be equal. Every parent should be willing to put their life on the line for each of their children.

Abagworo:
I love all my kids 100% equally

Then your kids are still young and have not yet developed very distinct personalities. When they do, you will see the ones that remind you of you, or of your mother, or your wife, etc.

And mostly the most unloved/hated child always become the rock of the house in future..

obembet:
My Dearest Nairalanders,. here we go today!

I strongly believe All children in a family should be treated equally, to prevent psychological problems. But sometimes, parents do have a special favourite.

Although, it is possible for parents to have a stronger emotional bond with one child over another, though this can vary based on numerous factors. The funniest part is that
Most parents are not aware that they may have a favorite child and generally feel that they love all their children the same.

Is there anyway to love all the kids in a family equality?

Do you have choice? Your own children o.

Watch how inexperienced young ones will be giving hypothetical contributions.

With this kind of question, my counsel is that anyone who is not ready for parenting must not have children o.

No it's not possible. Once there's interaction, no one love others equally except God. Don't be deceived, no parent loves his or her children equally but you dare not show or say it to anyone of them.

It is possible when they are below 15yrs.


It is difficult after 15yrs as some kids grow to become dangerous rebels to their parents and family.


So it all boils down to the character of the kids. And when they get to the age of making money, that is another deciding factor; the child that makes the most money and also gives his or her parents the most money and care wins their love the most

obembet:
My Dearest Nairalanders,. here we go today!

I strongly believe All children in a family should be treated equally, to prevent psychological problems. But sometimes, parents do have a special favourite.

Although, it is possible for parents to have a stronger emotional bond with one child over another, though this can vary based on numerous factors. The funniest part is that
Most parents are not aware that they may have a favorite child and generally feel that they love all their children the same.

Is there anyway to love all the kids in a family equality?

Emphatically yes it is more than possible. No parent does not love each child equally even though some may seem to adopt attitudes that the parents do not like but still yet they still love them. As parents we may show errant or deviant children our displeasure or we may withdraw our affection but it does not in any way mean we do not love them. Look at the prodigal child in the Bible. Even though the child forced the Parent to give him his inheritance in an unorthodox manner which defines custom and tradition, the Parent still obliged and the child wasted those scarce resources for nothing but the vanity and the banality of flesh. Yet when the child came back the Bible tells us the Father ran and met him while he had not yet approached home and kissed him and made a great banquet. So yes All Parents love all their children even though their may be some who are deviants i agree but no true Parent to their call will chose to hate a child they prayed and asked God who they nurtured and trained to any adult age would reject them based on their prodigality tendencies....

Any responsible parent would say that but deep down there, it's what it's.

Abagworo:
I love all my kids 100% equally

obembet:
My Dearest Nairalanders,. here we go today!

I strongly believe All children in a family should be treated equally, to prevent psychological problems. But sometimes, parents do have a special favourite.

Although, it is possible for parents to have a stronger emotional bond with one child over another, though this can vary based on numerous factors. The funniest part is that
Most parents are not aware that they may have a favorite child and generally feel that they love all their children the same.

Is there anyway to love all the kids in a family equality?

Love your kids equally or unequally is none of our business. Who ask you to born pikin? Ger.r.out

Yes but most times it depends on the child's behaviour. Yorubas say: omo to ba sipa ni baba n gbe.... It is the child that lifts his/her hand that the father will carry

It happens when they are all responsible, but 99% of the time, it doesn’t.

The reason it doesn’t happen is because of the bad character children exhibit. Respect you see begins at home and reflects in Life.

Discipline and respect often determine how much love and blessing children receive from their parents. While responsible parenting is key, children also play a major role. Those who are obedient and loyal tend to experience deeper affection and .

Unfortunately, when children talk back, disrespect, or even harm their parents, it creates emotional or physical wounds that can affect the relationship permanently.

Personally, even as an adult, I would never raise my voice at my mother—let alone insult her. When I see others do it, I’m genuinely shocked.

Respect is powerful. It’s often the reason people return—even after mistakes. A man may err, but if the woman he’s with carries herself with deep respect and dignity, he’ll often come back, humbled.

As men, we don’t mind going the extra mile or making sacrifices for a woman who is respectful, wise, and loyal. Sadly, many marriages fail today not because of lack of love, but because of lack of mutual respect.

Whether you’re a son, daughter, husband, or wife—respect is a foundation you can’t afford to ignore.

kennyz247:
And mostly the most unloved/hated child always become the rock of the house in future..

Some times yes but not always.

Kobojunkie:
1. I have never actually met parents who did that... loved their kids equally.

2. I don't know if it is possible, and it would be great if it were. But I have yet to meet parents who do.

Yes, parents don't love their children equally. Some may show it while some may not. It's natural . But generally, they don't tend to show it to avoid conflict amongst the children

No.

Sometimes, in fact most times, the villains we find distasteful outside is in us, and in our kids or siblings. It is impossible to love your kids equally.