NewStats: 3,264,407 , 8,183,622 topics. Date: Tuesday, 10 June 2025 at 10:39 PM 535z2q

I agree 700% percent with this one.

Any comments? How the hell did you think I got to know so much about sex.

Yep.

What Italians think about Englishmen
=============================

Hi I am Chris

I am writing these chronicles about what Italians maybe are thinking of
about English people, but not saying, because we are too polite, and not
wanting a fight you know.

I am Italian but I live in England for nearly two years, so I know quite
a lot about the English. I have to rub shoulders with them like they say
here.

I’ve lived for three months with English family and that was kind of
weired thing you know what? There are some crazy dudes the English
families, they not love one another very much at all for one thing that
I can see. All they care about is dog or getting one tiny scratch on
their car.

Man they have a car for three years, and they go ballistic if
one scratch get on it. I mean, man, how can you stop getting your car
scratched or banged, accidents happen all the time right, in my country
Italy anyway. Not in England. They care so much about their cars and
driving them so safely, they sooner have clean car than a good friend.

So I live in English family three months, with a friend who says he was
friend but was not, it turned out to be. But I stayed there anyway, I
had a piece of paper saying that I can and in England piece of paper
mean everything

And I go to university in Hull, I do computing studies course there for
one year. Hull is another word for Hell I think, or maybe is Hole. A big
hole in ground where all rubbish is thrown in, and all vomit the drunken
English guys on weekend nights after drinking twenty pints of beer and
then fighting. No-one in Hull like each other they not even respect each
other they just swear and fight each other all the time.

In my country Italy, you have a nice Saturday night, you know, you walk
with your friends you have a hang around in the piazza near the fountain
or the bar and everyone’s family are there.

You have what we call a eggiata, like a walk round, you have a
couple drinks of coke or orange juice or a crodino or an ice cream maybe
a little glass of beer but just one, and you have a laugh then you go
home for nice dinner and then you play cards with some other friends or
watch TV with your girlfriend and look at old family photographs
together. Is nice.

But In England on Saturday night you know you gonna have to do some
fighting or at least running to get away. I think is the weather yes,
maybe has something do with it – the sun never shines. Is always cold
like the hearts of English, and raining. Everybody get’s so drunk they
can hardly see, then they go and smash some windows or kick some old man
to death. Is very strange this behaviour.

Then I work for ancy firm in Slough one month. I glad when is
over because I can never know how to pronounce Slough. My spelling and
words in English is not so good I know, but my mathematics very good
and have good job for firm in Slough after completing my studies. I
think you know not many guys come from dump like Hull to Slough, so I
was coming lucky I think. Slough is dump as well actually, really horrid
in parts, and guys and even girls get really drunk there as well, I
don’t go to clubs in Slough, but good thing of Slough is its near
London, which useful, and nicer town nearer called Windsor, where the
Queen Elizabeth lives sometimes, it’s quite beautiful.

But I been very lucky, I good with figures and Excel spreadsheet, I know
a few tricks you know, and another funny thing about England all the
bosses are women. That’s funny thing because in Italy men are still in
control of things and women are mostly proper housewifes. They are a lot
of women that work in Italy, but that’s because most business are family
businesses, so if there’s girls in the family they’ll go into the family
business, you know what I mean. And some of them do a really good job
and are good at business. Then there's a lot of artists and film and
design and creative women in Italy and they’re very good at that and are
having power jobs in creative areas in Italy because of course Italians
really understand beauty, better than English or nearly anywhere else,
except maybe India, but don’t know I have to try India to see first
maybe one day.

But Italian girls are just beautiful from the inside to the outside, so
they understand how to make beautiful things, beautiful designs,
beautiful dresses, beautiful babies. But you don’t have a lot of woman
in Italian companies in charge of men, and it’s better that way because
woman can never be fulfilled at work, she has to be wife and have
children and a husband to buy her nice clothes and stuff to find
herself, know what I mean, before she can be a proper woman, yes? Is
more on the romantic side this conventional way. Am right, you think
about it, yes? Mediterranean is romantic method, my believes.

Because a woman have to have time to make herself beautiful from the
inside to the outside, she needs to be all nice relaxed with the things
nice for her and Italian girls understand this a lot better than
English, so they better always at being real women. Italian girl don’t
take any rubbish from boys that don’t treat them nicely, they respect
themselves a lot better than English girls, which is a reason they
dress better and look after their skin.

So I am thinking Italian women are lot happier than English women,
because they not pretending to be something that’s hard to do like
manage a lot of mens in an office, so instead Italian women can just
relax, and enjoy being women, which is what they’re best at, because
they are much more feminine than English woman anyway. Maybe that’s why
a lot of England women are working like men because they don’t having a
really feminine side like girls in Italy and in other warm Mediterranean
countries.

I am thinking, Italians are lucky as we are pretty good-looking to
English women you know, even if one is just average guy in Italy.
Another friend of mine also had an advantage in the English workplace
with all the woman managers though but they are all bit of English jam
tarts, you know what I mean, and not even good looking.

Maybe one English woman in ten million is good looking, but in Italy,
every girl is goddess, know what I mean, it our olive oil and fresh
fruit from our trees instead of baked beans every day or the lots of
sunny days we have in Italy or just basically the genetics of the thing
you know, it must be.

I was watching the English beauty contest of TV with some English guys
one night in Hull, and you know all the contestants were nothing you
would the next day. I wouldn’t touch none of them, they were so
ugly. They don’t even know how to put their own makeup on, and they wear
cheap clothes that don’t fit. They don’t value themselves, and they
don’t know how to walk properly. They don’t even have proper jewelery
because their boyfriends and husbands don’t value them. For Christmas
their husbands buy their wives vacuum cleaners I think, what an insult
to the feminine heart! No wonder they all slugs (slogs, slags, what is
right word?). They not want romance, they have never had it so they only
want a quick thing after the disco, is all they know how to do about
showing love. This is what I miss most about my country, no one for my
heart to love you know, is like looking for grain of sugar in the bag of
salt. Girls in England is a lot of miserable faces or they’re all sort
of damaged you know what I mean like old fruits like old peaches going
bad, not fresh even the young ones, is that it, yes? You wouldn’t put
your hand in a rotting bag of peaches would you no?

In other words how long should we wait before we can take it no more and want to just have sex and get it over with. Here it seems the limit is about two years or less.

That explains divorce in pentecostal churches. That must be it.

No one cares if you have sex or not. Anything more you want to add to the story?

Yep, you'll enjoy yourself so much that the roof will almost blow off. and you'll still feel it for a month.
Especially if he is the James Bond kind of man.

Because they are more experienced.

He has BIG hormonal imbalance then.

Rhodalyn that was a nice one, but i've given him that already.

Get him another girl and do that in three.

Normally when a woman begins to talk about her past I leave her immediately.
Is like looking for grain of sugar in the bag of salt. Girls with miserable faces or
they’re all sort of damaged you know what I mean like old fruits, like old peaches going
bad, not fresh even the young ones, is that it, yes? You wouldn’t put your hand in a rotting
bag of peaches, would you, no?

If it's not going to kill him, or have a kid hidden somewhere, I see no point. We are not expected to divulge everything about ourselves.

Two things I cant stand are:

1. Christians who are really boring and outdated, who are bible bashing freaks who give christianity a bad name as well.
2. People who label ALL christians as boring and nerdy unfortunately the many who are, give us all a bad name.

Not all christians are boring stereotypical bible bashers though and I am one of the ambassadors. There is hope in the world.

Yes according to Muslim understanding of faith and God, Abraham was Muslim. It means that he was perfect example of how Muslim should be.

That is just the same as the practice of indulgences that the protestant church fathers originally faught against. Money is the biggest curse.

Never going even start, forget.

Nice way to spread all your things here.

I know people who God never saw them through.

When Almost Everything Is Working Against You, there's only one thing you can do - Give UP

I suppose they do.

Not me, no love for tarantulas.